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But I think I will now.

I've had a small victory on the homefront.

See, I'm engaged. My fiance and I have been going around about firearms - and she's a good debator ::) She adjusted to having someone around who carries 24/7 and keeps loaded guns at his house, ready for immediate access.

But... she said a while back that I wasn't getting anymore after we are married.

I got to talking to her tonight, told her it's a passion, like her knitting is now and her gymnastics were before she blew a tendon. I further told her that some pieces are works of art and history: BHP, 1911, Colt SA, etc. I also told her that I used to have a fairly large firearms collection (true) and I stupidly sold or traded most (also true - I figured I only needed one handgun, one shotgun, and one .22). I told her that I was very passionate about firearms as she's passionate about other things, and that I'd like to start my collection back up.

I can have my 1911 here as long as I bring my mini-safe! And, after we're married and living together, I can have as many as I like as long as I buy a safe first! (I just hung them on the walls before, but that was then and somebody was always around).

I like concessions
And, she does like shooting the .22 now and again.

Josh <><
 

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So, lessee, you talked her into letting you buy a couple safes and all the guns you want, and she thinks she got a concession somewhere in that deal? Good negotiating skills, you should join our State Department, they certainly could use the help!

elb
 

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hmmmm ....Josh, this post sounds like it might belong, in the one shot stopping power, thread..... your lady is a good shot, and I would guess this is not a topic won. best of luck.
 

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ELB,

Nosir, she made the concession to let me have my guns as long as they're in a safe which I now believe to be a good idea anyway. I was a country boy growin' up and still am really. The drill was to put a gun lock on anything not being used at the time. No safes.

So, I have to make the "concession" of a gun safe.

Josh <><
 

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Josh,

I suspect some of us with a few more decades of life experience are being tongue in cheek with you.

I also suspect your sweetheart is thinking something to the effect that, "I'll let him think what he wants now, but when we're married..."

Trust me Mate, you haven't won a thing and the matter isn't settled. I suggest the two of you go see your parish priest for some face to face pre-marital counselling to come to terms with your differences now.

Yes, I'm being a wet blanket and the prophet of doom, but my son went through similar circumstances with a lovely young lady to whom he was engaged.
 

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Joshua: Please, never ever sell any firearms to please a fiance or spouse. If you must sell, the proceeds will go towards an item that will benefit you both. But to sell to please her wishes because she doesn't like guns? Remember, you had your firearms before you had her.

She'll won't go around your guns like you won't be playing with her knitting needles...... And yes, but a LARGE gun safe and let it be known why you purchased such a large one.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Please, never ever sell any firearms to please a fiance or spouse. If you must sell, the proceeds will go towards an item that will benefit you both. But to sell to please her wishes because she doesn't like guns? Remember, you had your firearms before you had her.
I haven't, and I won't. I sold my gun collection before I went to college because I couldn't take them all with me and with me 220 miles away, there'd be no one to keep them from rusting.

Selling my guns is not something she'd ask me to do.

Josh <><
 

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Hi there Josh,


As usual, Abninftr speaks with words of wisdom. Take heed! G>M>F>
I agree wholeheartily.

Having been married twice before, make certain all issues including firearms ownership are addressed before going to the alter.

The present "love of my life" has completely different interests than I do right now. Diversity of interests should be "well respected" in a successful relationship.

Chris
 

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Josh,

Go back, lad. It's a trap!!!

Don't want to hear about you getting a knitting needle in the heart!

Wes

P.S. My bride has gone one record as saying "a man can't have to many guns". She's taken and doesn't have a sister... ;)
 

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And as the esteemed Father of Psychology said:

"A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity"

-Sigmund Freud , "General Introduction to Psychoanalysis"

Sam
 

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Well Josh,
The others may be right, and of course it's far better to be sure before vows are exchanged.

But don't let us weigh down a happy time for you, either. My wife didn't like guns when we started dating, and didn't want them in her house. She was never exposed to them as a kid, was always told how dangerous they are, etc. (you know what I mean.) She really did change, but not her personality or character, or any of those other things that really can't be changed. She simply realized over time that what she had been taught was inaccurate. Very rational. She doesn't shoot much, but she has no problem with my passion. She doesn't like it if I leave my pistols laying on the coffee table, or a rilfe in every corner, but we simply did not have an ongoing problem like you're being warned about.
 

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"But... she said a while back that I wasn't getting anymore after we are married."




Josh <><
Just to clarify... You fiancee said you "weren't getting any more FIREARMS after you were married", correct?

Enough of the levity... I'm an old fart, set in my ways, but the fact that your fiancee felt confident enough to TELL you what you might be allowed to have, or not to have is a red flag for me.

We've been married for over 38years, but my little bride has NEVER told me what I could, or could not have. She knows me well enough to know that wouldn't fly for a second. I'm blessed in that she has no problem with firearms, and in fact has a pristine Colt Cobra as her personal cc, or vehicle firearm of choice.

If however, when we were dating she had told me what she was going to ALLOW me to have after our marriage, there would have been no marriage.......

Get this stuff straighten out BEFORE any nuptials, or you are looking for grief after.

I have no problem whatsoever with having a gun safe, that's just prudent. But I have a big problem with a fiancee who has it in her mind that she can be the final vote in what I could nor could not own.

Your fiancee sounds like a real honey, and I hope it all goes well with you and the relationship. I just don't think you want her even thinking she has the veto power over what you can own for the rest of your life.

I'm a BIG believer in marriage being a 50/50 proposition.. I try in every way to accomodate my wife in all things because I love her, and want her happy. But when it comes down to a serious decison, such as guns ownership, my 50% becomes 50.1%, and hers is reduced to 49.9%. I don't think many wives want a husband they can boss, even tho I think all of them will test you every now and then.

It's not politically correct to voice such opinions, but the man of the house should be just that, the MAN of the house. There's gonna be an "Alpha Male" in the house, whether you like it or not. Just make sure the Alpha Male in your house doesn't have a blown tendon from a gymnastics injury... You won't be happy, she won't be happy.

Hey, I'm a a senior citizen, what do I know, right? But I have been in a marriage for a long time, I have observed many, many other marriages over the years, and SOMEBODY has to have a deciding vote in important things. Most wives want a husband to have that strength and make the hard calls, but if you won't do it, SHE WILL. That's just life, politically correct or not.

Get it straight before the marriage..

JMOFO ::)
 
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